18 November 2011

Finding a doula.

A few years ago a friend of mine raved about her doula.  Her what?

Her doula.  Similar to a mid-wife-- a person who is there to assist & support you during labor.  Different doulas take on different roles.

At any rate, I checked into it when we first got pregnant & found it to be a bit pricey- around $1,000.  Not that it was overpriced, just out of our comfortable price range.  Well, I'm not sure where I was looking, but yesterday I started to search again after some encouragement from my old friend.  Instead of the previous $1,000 price tags, I found $300-600 being about the average.  For someone who is trained & certified, as well as has experience, that's not too bad!  I mean, for real, they're on call for our birth-- and who knows what day or time that will be?

So it begins... I emailed a few for more information... talked to two already.  One was a definite 'no.'  Aside from a personality quirk & talking really slowly (which I would not be able to handle during labor) she pretty much told me how inexperienced she was, & described herself as "like a sister during labor."  Well, that's cool & all, but I have a lot of friends who are "like a sister" to me that would probably be willing to be there for free...  Also?  Saying things like, "I've been at a few births & decided it's just so neat that I'd like to do that all the time" is not very encouraging.  Again, I have plenty of friends who 'have been at a few births.'  Reminds me of when people say, "I just love taking pictures, so I decided to be a photographer."

But the 2nd doula I talked to... well, we meshed a lot better together.  She seemed to understand that there can be a balance between natural childbirth & modern science, and knows that I really dig having someone there who is down to earth & knows all the medical stuff to give us a 2nd opinion should any situation arise that requires us to make a decision.  Also?  To talk me through labor, and be there for Josh.

Josh is totally my rock & I know he is going to be my biggest source of support, but if there is one thing that really throws him off his game, it's seeing me in pain.  He hates it, and he'll do anything to make my pain go away.  And seeing how labor promises to be painful, I think having a doula there will be helpful to let him know that the pain is okay & to calm any fears he has.

So... we'll see how this turns out!  We're meeting with the 2nd doula this weekend, and will hopefully decide by Thanksgiving.

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